i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I puked the same amount of times as the number of bars i went to last night
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
How long have I been using my debit card as a coaster?
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
Thanks a lot dude. I'm grateful to you for your gift of pure piss.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
Randomize
