I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Trevor is horny so he just called me to tell me all the things that he would like to do with his future wife. That's a new one.
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
Randomize
