You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize