I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
your idea of a balenced meal is a microwave frozen burrito, a cup of ramen noodles, and a can of budlight. honestly tell me how your resolution is to lose weight,
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Randomize