It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Your dad just texted me? He said I needed to holler at him when I get up tomorrow. I honestly thought you had somehow gone to jail.
Vodka?
Forever.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
Randomize
