So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
Your dad needs a mid life crisis affair thing, I could totally be that girl.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
What drink are we having for lunch?
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Randomize
