well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I feel like dick that good should always be within a five kilometre radius of me.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Randomize
