We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I just woke up from quarter beer tuesdays wearing 3 pairs of underwear, none of which are the ones I left wearing...2 Around my waist and one around my shoulder in an attempt at a bra. At least drunk me tries to be decent?
my brain is opting to stay half drunk rather than relearn how to think. the rest of me is in no position to argue.
I'm way too hungover for life right now
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I have been adopted by a clan of drunken skinny dipping tourists.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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