Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
