im drinking this country out of the recession.
What ever happened to making out with a few boob grabs here and there?
I saved him in my fone as special pumba. he was just pumba but then he found me drugs
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
