is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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