I called her the wrong name twice and she still called me back this morning. DO I still wait two days to call her back?
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
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