This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
Randomize