And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
He asked me If i had cheated on my boyfriend when I said no he said it's like he doesnt know me anymore
I sent him a pic of my tits.. All he said was, "oh your sun burn"
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
MAGGIE IS ON MY COUCH PETTING AN HONEST TO CHRIST ARMADILLO AND SOBBING INTO HOT CHOCHOLATE. WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO TO HER.
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Randomize
