There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
Last night I texted her to confirm she could start designing costumes for my show this week.
That is one convoluted booty call.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
He's in grad school at Harvard. I suppose that means my vagina is now smarter than I am.
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
Hey! Happy Birthday! Could you do me a favor and bring my underwear to the bar?
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
