I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Another day, another engagement, another cat
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
HE WAS DRESSED LIKE A FISHERMAN AND HE WAS LIKE OH SHIT I THINK I JUST FOUND THE DEADLIEST CATCH i couldnt not go for it my honour compelled me
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
