As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
You could totally spank that new found Catholicism out of him.
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
