Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
thanks for house sitting, cat must be hiding again... everything go ok?
... about that ...
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
I got shot at today. If that doesn't get me at least a blow job I give up working on the south side
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
The cops busted down the door and everyone ran. I was just trying to find my shirt before I got arrested
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
