i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
I Pavlov-trained him by smacking him in the nuts anytime I caught him looking at another girl in public. To this day, he's afraid to break eye contact with me in a restaurant if a tall busty blonde walks in.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
Fun fact: You might be drunk if your vision is so blurry that you almost ask "do you know where my glasses are?" while you're wearing them.
I love you too, but sadly you're not as good at getting me out of bed as cocaine.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
