Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
just found my old 10th grade stash of beer in a shoebox. guess who's getting trashed tonight
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
You said "I'm not gonna waste my last condom on you" last night.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
