She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
The good news is the house is clean, the bad news is someone redecorated the bonus room by spray painting "free willy" on the wall in honor of the girl who passed out in there last night.
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
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