you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
You yelled "Everybody!!! Round of applause to Jill for not doing anal!!" Right in front of him.
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize
