I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
WHY DOES HE HAVE TO CALL WHEN I'M MASTURBATING?! This time I'm really pissed. It's like he knows he's depriving me of orgasms.
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
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