He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
Oh and my new excuse for not being able to hook up is cholera, feel free to use it
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
She took the fish and put it in the hot tub, then turned on the jets. She said she was training it for the Olympics.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
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