Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
i chose cheese fries over sex for the third time this week.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize