so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
just so you know, you can get through airport security with handcuffs no questions asked
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
What happened lastnight it looks like I had sex with edward scissor hands....my back is so messed up
my bad i broke a mirror over your back
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize