I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
She is sending me pics of her sex faces...which totally counts as sexting in my book
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Randomize