Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
Did you apologize to him for the trip to the strip club as a first date or is that something that just gets swept under the rug??
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
