I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
Randomize
