Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
What I wanna know is who took a picture eiffel towering her?
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
I told him I would only take his calls if he was dead, dying, capturing a midget, or buying me shots.
I stand by my new policy.
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
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