I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
The only pictures he has from one of the biggest football weekends is an album titled "I miss my dog" filled with tons of pictures of his dog and him. This relationship must end.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
You're going to have to tell him your name isn't Ivor McTruckson eventually.
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
walk of shame into the pharmacy with a busted up chin and laughing the lady at the counter rolled her eyes at me when I asked for the morning after pill.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Randomize
