HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
literally have a bruise on my forehead from being over the toilet all night.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
Dude she broke four ribs, how does a 110 lb girl break four of my ribs during sex?! It hurts so bad but was so worth it
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
I do remember telling her that I was about to pass out soon and then hiding my pants under my bed so she couldn't take my wallet even drunk I'm thinking ahead
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
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