Contrary to popular belief alot of woman do actually enjoy sucking cock.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
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