so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Just puked on the beach. Hungover. In front of my parents. I love summer.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Just seen a lady with the back of her head shaved and the rest of her hair in a pony tail like a sumo wrestler with a 6 inch glass dolphin hair clip. Nothing is going to ruin my day.
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
just licked whipped cream off some model's nipple... just coming clean for when the pic gets on instagram because i am not untagging that shit
Randomize
