Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
Having to crawl on my hands and knees because I woke up with a mysterious broken foot this morning...
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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