we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
I got her a Nickelback box set.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
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