She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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