Someone shit on the floor
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
Randomize
