So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I'll pull you in a wagon. You'll have a sash and a crown on and we'll sing "All the Single Ladies"
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Thank you for not boning my boss.
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
All three of my roommates have their significant others over. We're all hanging out in the living room. It's like I'm the trifecta of third-wheeling
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
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