I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
We have zombies coming, and all you can think about is cock.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
We ate sushi in a hospital bed, then fucked in a bathroom while I wore a gown. Pretty sure she's the one
If the guys trying to booty call text me could see me right now in some raggedy pajamas with toothpaste down the front of my shirt eating pepperoni out of the package they might change their minds
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
