This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
mimosa in my stainless steel water bottle. going green is not that bad.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
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