Can Purell be used as lube?
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
i'm considering texting him with "i'm leaving the country for a year, wanna fuck?"
do it. it's every man's dream.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Never thought I'd say this but the maple syrup flavored vodka probably wasn't our best idea
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
Randomize
