Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
Can't wait to go see my drug dealers baby being born. He rolled all of the "it's a boy" cigars into blunts.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
All I've consumed in the last 24 hours is cranberry vodka and kosher for passover biscotti
That's what happens when you party with the tribe
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
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