the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
MEET ME OUTSIDE YOUR HOUSE IN THREE MINUTES. BE DRUNK. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
STDs are my biggest fear, besides whales. They're so fucking big.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Always a gay best friend, never a bridesmaid
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Randomize
