your room smells of hookers.
And success
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
