his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
Just saw 3 10-year olds in business suits drinking iced coffees at the cafe. I'm officially a failure if these kids have jobs and I don't.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Asking the cop for directions wearing a lion mask may not have been my best moment...
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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