Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
You tried to tip the paramedic for finding you.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
Randomize
