Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
My parents worry about me having parties when they go on vacation. Umm no it just means I'm drinking and smoking alone on the first floor of the house instead of the second
Hashtag Pathetic
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
Randomize
