SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Randomize
