I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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