I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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